Yes, the magnitude of the bad breath is exponential to the number of people it’s killed. Frankly, its teeth should be rotting and her skull melting, it’s so bad. I mean, it might even be worse than mine after a night of snoring!
Death of a Unicorn (2025). Cool name for a story, isn’t it? Yeah?
Savor it. Because it’s the best part of this clunker. It starts right at the beginning, when I turned to my Arts Editor and said, “This feels like a paint-by-number movie.” The money-distracted divorced father, trying and failing to connect with the daughter. The disaffected daughter, alone among the crowd of … rich, yet money-besotted, family hosting them in the Canadian Rockies.
And what happens when the divorced father, trying to win his daughter’s, doesn’t notice that, ummmmm, unicorn standing in the middle of the road?
Yes, this is all painfully predictable, outside, perhaps, of the set of chompers these magical beasties sport. Impressive in what should be herbivores. I mean, that is a fermentation vat between their legs and not a meat grinder.
But never mind. It’s terrible. The unicorns are sort of fun. But this wretched story is just not worth it.
