When I saw this picture, I just knew the sexual overtones demanded this be the picture du jour. du soup. Whatever.
Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024) is the sequel to Godzilla vs. Kong (2021), which I wrote off as an execrable mess. Does this second try rescue the first?
See, a major character is sacrificed! It must be a serious effort!
Sorry, no.
(My alternative review: Kong meets Gypsy Danger and something like sex ensues. It’s not a turn-on.)
(Also, when a new Titan, a category containing Godzilla and all the other monsters in this little Godzilla offshoot known as the Monsterverse, is introduced named Shimo, I read the caption as Shemp. I took it seriously for the briefest of moments. Maybe Shimo is a portmanteau of Shemp and Moe? Sadly, Shimo lacked charisma, being just another monster.)
While the CGI is impressive, that’s a low bar to clear these days. The human characters never emerge from their cardboard matrix, and having to repress applauding their demise is not a good sign. In summary, I didn’t care about any of them.
The monsters? I do like the appearance of the title characters; the others, not so much. But it is necessary to mention that the climactic monster fight, in what seems to be zero or negative gravity, is a challenge, in silliness, to the dinosaurs swinging from vines in Peter Jackson’s version of King Kong (2005).
Don’t waste gobs of money on this one, either. I only kept watching it for the review potential and to keep up to date on the Godzilla mythos.
