“The monster knew some great jokes, I gotta say!” Howard said. “Too bad I broke her arm when I started laughing.”
The Unnamable (1988) is a bloody rendering of an H. P. Lovecraft story of the same name, which mostly doesn’t rise above its schlock origins. Two characters, the scholar Carter and the clownish Howard, are meant to elevate the movie above its mundane horror trappings, but the actors are not strong enough to get there – or do not get the chance with the director.
No matter: an ancient horror trapped in an old house, hormone-driven college students using it as a place to makeout, with Hell directly below – what could go wrong?
Plenty, at least to – no, not in, but to – this story. And, no, I did NOT enjoy yelling at the TV STOP WALKING BACKWARDS!
As my Arts Editor commented, this was a road-kill story. You want to look away, and yet you can’t. What could they possibly do next –
