There’s been a lot of outrage after President Trump suggested the Tree of Life synagogue needed a guard, as noted in Business Insider:
Trump was responding to a reporter who asked if he felt compelled to “revisit gun laws” after a gunman opened fire while shouting anti-Semitic slurs at a Saturday morning prayer service at the Tree of Life Congregation Synagogue.
Trump, speaking just over an hour after Pittsburgh police confirmed they had taken 48-year-old Robert Bowers into custody, said that if the synagogue had “protection inside, the results would have been far better.”
I think the approach of outrage is misguided. I suggest a more rational approach, as follows:
Sure, an armed guard might have stopped this attacker.
But he wouldn’t have stopped three armed attackers.
Oh, but you cry, that’s never happened before, and it won’t happen here in America.
Oh, sorry, sorry. I didn’t realize you don’t read history or current events.. It’s happened many times throughout history, and, given the extremist rhetoric flooding the net, it seems very unlikely that haters will continue their individual assaults. After all, someone with a big megaphone and a small brain – or, perhaps, a foreign brain (Russian? Iranian?), will begin encouraging attacks by groups.
Oh, but then we can post more guards!
You sure can.
And bigger guards.
Sure. Wannabe basketball players? Yep. How many do you need?
Uh …
And you don’t want to drain the pews, do you? Hard to get folks into the proper tithing mood when they’re armed to the incisors. They even feel like they’ve already given.
No!
Oh, yes, they will. But here’s what I suggest: privatize it!
What? Oh, yes, that’ll work!
Big companies can supply guards to all you faithful types! In fact, I’ve noticed there’s a wonderful place for a machine gun nest up on the Holy Cross. For you Christians, at least. I’ve never been in any other religious structure, except in India. For instance, how about a nest right up in the balcony at East Bay Calvary?
That’s America for you, isn’t it?! Isn’t it wonderful?
Sure. For the first two months.
Uh, what do you mean?
Hey, profit’s everything, right? That’s the American way. Hell, profit’s more important than Jesus. Just ask Pat Robertson.
Now you’re just being ridiculous.
I’ll pass that on to Pat, and I warn you, he may disagree with you. Just imagine that big ol’ machine gun peering down at the pews, just waiting for that sneak attack from some hater, your faithful defender’s finger on the trigger –
You’re being a jerk.
I’m being a jerk? What if your defender gets the hiccups?
Fuck off.
Certainly, I can see I’ve inserted some unfortunate thoughts in your head, and you’ll need to wash them out. But just one more thing …
What?
What if your defender, that guy with his finger on the trigger of that heavy machine gun, is a hater? Or … a liberal?
Have fun, kids! Glad I don’t feel that need to attend to religious services, sounds like everyone’s at risk now.
And I wouldn’t dream of suggesting, you know, that sort of thing. The NRA might die of heart disease if I did.
