He didn’t get the part for Punch ‘n Judy.
It’s a Danish monster movie! Reptilicus (1961) (I believe we saw the American version, cut for TV; there’s also a Danish version, which may differ slightly from the English version, according to Wikipedia) kicks off the very earnest fun by finding blood and reptile parts in in the effluvia brought up by a drill operation looking for oil. Returned to the Danish lab in Copenhagen, the small parts begin to regenerate under the care of the scientists. Eventually, amidst a storm of sarcastic comments from my Arts Editor and yours truly, they have a tail that continues to slowly grow.
Then, during a violent electrical storm presumably ordered up by Victor Frankenstein, the tail suddenly exhibits a growth spurt reminiscent of those experienced by thirteen year old boys, and the resultant monster, merely glimpsed by the scientists, gendarmerie, and comic relief (I kid you not!) – in a rare good decision by the movie makers – kills one of the scientists (it’s so hard to find good gratitude these days) and escapes to the sea. Despite the best efforts of the military, it comes back ashore, where the last good decision is dropped and we get to view the monster in all his amateurish armor-plated glory. In the most memorable scene of the movie, it kills the father of an innocent fishing family, eating him alive.
A human makes the pills go down easier!
My Arts Editor shrieked something about Monty Python at this juncture, while I just giggled madly as the victim, outlined in a neon light, went down the gullet.
The movie lurches along from there. At one point, depth charges are used to jolt it out of the sea after it had been barbecued, but this causes panic in the scientific community, as they fear that blowing it into, say, N pieces might result in N monsters – that regeneration thing, doncha know. Eventually, the monster begins to spout neon-green slime (the movie makers seemed to really like the neon palette) which is apparently an acid; however, no one actually runs from it, so we decided it must merely be rough on folks’ aesthetic senses.
After a good ravaging (or perhaps ravishing, depending on your point of view) of Copenhagen, the military is faced with the problem of “Now we have it trapped, what do we do with it?” After all, explosives are Right Out. Naturally, it’s the off-the-cuff remark concerning drugs that carries the day, and the ladies step forward to make up the poison (a gallon’s worth), while the general himself shoots it into Reptilicus’ mouth in an amazing shot. And so all’s well that ends well, so long as you don’t live in Copenhagen.
Except there’s that foot blown off Reptilicus during the depth charging.
We did not see the MST3K version, but I understand they did a fine job with Reptilicus. I strongly suggest you watch this with a fortifier of some sort in hand. Or several.
